Monday, April 28, 2014

The Wedding Dress Love note was a lie


I came home yesterday after a wonderful weekend with my daughter and found Ben had left this note on my desk. It kind of sums it all up.We are happiest when we are together. Since my trip to see Cassie was to be there when she choose a wedding dress, it was a time of reflection for me as well. And since Ben and I were in pretty much constant communication, it made me miss him more.

Through the magic of face time, Ben got to visit with Cassie and Mark along with me. But there were a few glitches. I was at a restaurant with them, in constant chat with Ben and sending him "you should be here" photos of his favorite foods, when he decided to face time me. I'd been enjoying a bit of libation and when suddenly challenged with etiquette of video chat in a restaurant - I lost it. The ring was loud, his voice was loud and all very public. Instead of adjusting my phone's volume, I literally threw the phone into my purse. 

Cassie is an amazing, beautiful young woman. At 27 she is a lawyer and working with her finance at his father's firm near NYC. She passed the bars in both New Jersey and New York on the first try. She developed an eye for good design by growing up with Ben and I. It's no surprise that she has taken control of every aspect of what will be an beautiful wedding with amazing attention to detail, design and organization. It's four months after the proposal and a year before the wedding and Cassie already has secured the perfect location, caterer, rabbi and she's chosen a string quartet that masterfully composes modern songs into a classic presentation. I've heard them and they are amazing. The song she's chosen for the bride's entrance is perfect...classical, elegant and with just the right amount of Disney Princess.

She showed me photo after photo of details she's gathered on Pinterest. It helps that I am a designer, but I could see how it will all come together. It will be stunning.

The bridal gallery was more than a bit intimidating - row after row of designer wedding gowns with prices that started at $3,000. There were 4 stations where brides to be were trying on gowns before huge framed mirrors with friends and mom's watching, smiling, commenting. When it was her turn, Cassie calmly showed a few photos and gave her price range and dress concept to the sales woman who then gathered dresses and took Cassie to try each on. There is a saying that when the bride finds the right dress, she will cry. I did not realize the same would hold true for the bride's mother. It only took 2 dresses. The second one had every single detail Cassie had specified and seeing her in it took everyone's breath away, including all the other brides to be and the entire sales staff.  The dress was exactly her size and looked like it was designed for every curve of her body. Think Jessica Rabbit. Not only will she be beautiful, but she will be the sexiest woman at her wedding. But the final touch, the thing that brought she and I to tears was the veil. As it was clipped to the back of her hair there was a sense of what all this was about. She was marrying the man she loves and who loves her.

When the sales woman suggested wearing her mother's veil, Cas and I burst out laughing. "Tell her about your wedding to Ben, Mom" I explained that Ben and I and everyone at the wedding wore tie dyed shirts we made ourselves, that Cas and her brother stood up with us, and that we improvised our wedding on the Santa Cruz boardwalk. While the woman was struggling with how to respond, Cassie said "it was awesome."

Whether its a $50,000 wedding or a $500 wedding, when you marry the love of your life - it's awesome.





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